I had it once again. The moment that I tried to not involve in. The moment I hate the most. I really wanted the life that goes so smooth. No worries, no doubt and no negative things. Even in a short time. Yeah I admit, this what life is all about. Sometime we're on the top but sometime we're on the bottom. Its up to the people how they should control the emotions, the mental to face all the fears. But for me, sometime I feel life is so cruel. I just enjoy the happy moment for awhile while I need to face the gloomy moment for long long time. I know, that gloom, that sadness will make me stronger. But I'm tired with is. How I should story to my future children, what my life is all about? Dumped by ex-boyfriend? Arguing with best friends? Failing on my exam? Misunderstanding with my siblings? How? There's nothing nice to story about me to them. I just ashamed myself soon.
I just can't accept what I've done few days ago. I put my trust on someone that I just knew for few hours. I've promised to myself to avoid from doing such thing (again). But I don't know how I can closed my eyes and give him chance to be loved by me. I don't know how I can feel so cozy with him so easy. I just knew him. Okay, we've been chat for several times but not that often. And now? He left me. Just like what Khidhir had done to me. Maybe Khidhir give a sign to leave me. But him? No explanation from him. He didn't even try to end it properly. I don't know how, but could him do this to me since he knew what he did, he'll receive the pay from God. Hurgh, he messed up my life right now. I try to forget him. Try to forget my stupidity. Try to forget how I can be that stupid. Urghh! I bet I'll sick with man after this. Yeah, I have to. No choice.
♥LiyyaS
